whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
