For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
