If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
