i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
