Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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