I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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