Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
