return my video game
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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