I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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