Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
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