Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize