I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
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