Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
