I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
