Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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