we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize
