I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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