I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I need to sanitize my soul.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
