it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
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