Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
