she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
