Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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