If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
