Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize