I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
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