By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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