I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
