Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Randomize
