i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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