Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize