Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
