I'm jealous of your bromance
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
So many bounce houses so little time
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
