the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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