Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
