I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
