So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
