escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
