So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Please, let me fuck your mom
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Another day, another engagement, another cat
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
