I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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