Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
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