everyone is single if you try hard enough
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
