He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
