I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Randomize
