Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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