Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
