Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Randomize
