I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
