Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
We are two peas in an std pod
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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