so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
