Tell her she can't have a vagina
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
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