So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
That accounts for only three of the penises
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
