do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
